“You deserve way better than someone who treats you like that!” a supportive best friend says after a rough breakup. Respectfully, I disagree.
We are not deserving of anything. When you come into the world, the world owes you nothing. You are not entitled to a car, a roof over your head, or a job once you graduate. You aren’t entitled to a relationship with someone who treats you the same way you would treat your celebrity crush.
Instead, we earn what we want in life through our actions, and through hard work.
I learned this lesson in my teenage years, when my mom refused to buy me a phone. “All of my friends have one, and I have straight A’s, and I deserve it!” I firmly believed that due to my existence, and doing things I was expected to do anyways, that I was entitled to an iPhone.
“Get a job,” my mom would respond. Although this made me unhappy at the time, I know now that my mom was setting me up for a life of satisfaction.
I learned that if something in life isn’t the way you want it, you are responsible for changing it. Want a phone? Get a job. Think you should get a raise? Work harder, smarter, solve a problem at work, go the extra mile. Want great relationships? Work on yourself, improve your communication, become more patient, understanding, and caring.
Want a better life? Do what you need to do to get there. It’s not anyone’s responsibility but your own. #MoneyGoals
(Pictured: A pile of dirt that I used to fill in holes in my parents’ lawn. Mora, MN. August, 2016)